Momma Moments

Where to start?  I can say this, I have been pretty busy over the last few days.  I must admit this post will be a "braggin" moment for this here Momma.  I'd like to start with my 6th grader made ALL A's!!!!  Hello Principal's Honor Award!  Congrats Cameron ~ I am VERY proud of you and your accomplishments this year.  He also continues to reach all of his AR points! 
WAY TO GO PEANUT!!!

This week started off with my oldest son turning 20.  Yes, you read this correctly.  Kyle is now 20 years old.  It made me feel OLD.  He calls me old often but I honestly felt it when the words actually came out of my mouth Kyle is now 20.  Let me tell you, tears have flowed.  If you know me you don't doubt this point.  On a personal note (the part that irritates Kyle most) I wish you son the very BEST that life has to offer.  My hopes are that you make the most of every learning moment you face.  I look forward to watching you continue to grow into the man I know in my heart you will be!  I love you most for the strong person you are today!  Keep that head held high and keep on keepin' on!  Never forget you will ALWAYS hold my heart.  I love you KYLE JAMES!

Are you ready for this?  Cameron turns 12 this week.  My, where has the time gone? *Even more tears are flowing*  People always say you better cherish the moments when your kids are little.  I now understand exactly what they meant.  Cameron Michael you will always be my Peanut.  I hope our cuddle moments don't fade away because if they do my heart will break.  You are becoming an amazing leader with such a huge heart.  As much as I may annoy you, I hope you understands it's only because I love you and want the best for you kiddo!!  I hope you enjoy a VERY Happy Birthday and I hope you have tons of fun at your BIG BIRTHDAY BASH this weekend.  May you be surrounded by your family & friends.  Most of all make a lot of happy memories!  Here's to your last year of being a TWEEN my handsome Cameron!

Being a mother has deep meaning to me.  I know without a doubt I am loved because I can see it in their faces.  I know I have been abundantly blessed by having two healthy and handsome boys.  I could not be more thankful that God gave them to me.  What they bring to me emotionally is beyond words.  Sometimes I think my heart and tears can only express my love.  Kyle & Cameron you have no idea just how proud I am to be your Momma!  I adore you both and admire your individuality!

When you have brought up kids, there are memories you store directly in your tear ducts. ~Robert Brault

Still one of my FAVORITE pics....

I LOVE MY BOYS!

Prayer Day 26 & 27

January 26
Lord, whenever I am afflicted with loneliness, I know the enemy plays with my mind and makes me think I am unloved or rejected.  Thank You that You always love me and never reject me.  Thank You that because of Your presence in my life, I don't have to live with loneliness in my heart.  Give me the "continual feast" of a heart that is happy no matter the circumstances.
He who is a merry heart has a continual feast.
Proverbs 15:15

January 27
Lord, I invite Your presence to invade my life in a fresh, new way.  Help me to sense Your presence in greater power and depth than I have ever been able to before.  Overflow me with Your love, peace and joy.  And crowd out anything in me that is not Your will for my life.  Take away all feelings of seperation, rejection or lack of connection to others.  Give me a greater sense of being connected to You.
Lo, I am with you always, even to the end of age.
Matthew 28:20

Prayer Day 25

I ENJOY READING THE PRAYERS FROM THIS LITTLE BOOK!

 

VERY THANKFUL FOR THE SMELL OF RAIN,

THE LOVE I HAVE FOR MY BOYS, 

THE FACT I KNOW I HAVE A LOVING & GOD FEARING HUSBAND, 

THE CUP OF COFFEE I ENJOYED THIS MORNING & THE PEACE THAT I FEEL TODAY!  I AM BLESSED!!

GOD > OUR CIRCUMSTANCE
January 25
Lord, whenever You went through times of trouble, You always withdrew from the crowd and went to a place by Yourself to be alone with Your heavenly Father.  Help me to learn to do that too.  At the first sign of loneliness or lack of peace, remind me to draw closer to You and sense the comfort of Your presence and the healing power of Your love.
You have made him most blessed forever; You have made him exceedingly glad with Your presence.
Psalm 21:6

Respecting Your Husband

Lots of good stuff to share today.  I have really enjoyed some facebook posts and the blog of Jennifer.  She is the writer behind Unveiled Wife.  Read HER STORY HERE.  I know I am not alone when I say she yanks on some cords that are very personal that most of us ladies can relate to.  What I have taken from her posts/blog is her commitment to draw closer to her husband through prayer, love, inner strength and her will to want more from marriage.  In my opinion it's a positive outlet and my hopes are that sharing will motivate or help others out there.  We all can use more positive in our lives and everyone yearns for happiness, especially in marriage.   

PRAYER FOR THE DAY ~ RESPECTING MY HUSBAND 01.25.12 

Dear Lord,

Thank you for my loving husband. Thank you for giving me such a beautiful gift. I pray that I would have a better attitude towards my husband. I pray that I can express more joy and appreciation towards him. Please help me to have control over my tongue and my emotions. Sometimes I feel like I cannot get over certain issues quick enough, and I suffer with lingering bitterness in my heart. Please remove bitterness from me and replace it with grace and love. Please help me in those moments of forgiveness to truly forgive my husband just as you forgave me. Please give me the strength to bounce back and restore our relationship. Help me to respect and honor my husband no matter what! Please show me how to be a more loving wife in Jesus name AMEN!

UNTHANKFULNESS IN MARRIAGE LEADS TO A JOYLESS LIFE

Take time to read the link above.  She posted it on January 17th this year.  It is AWESOMENESS!  Makes you think and hopefully eye opening too!

My thoughts today:  I certainly hope today is the start to something more for you and your marriage or relationship.  Let today be the first day of the rest of your life!!!  I believe that marriage is a two way street.  I know it takes tremendous effort and not 100% up to just us (ladies) to have a successful productive marriage but it can definitely start with us.  You have heard the saying BE THE CHANGE YOU WANT TO SEE IN THE WORLD!  You can become the woman your husband wants to be around and wants to fall deeper in love with.  Personally I am looking forward to a more rewarding relationship with my husband and I know in my heart we were missing the most important link.  We did not have the Lord Jesus as our foundation.  Our faith was weak.  We were lacking maturity & communication.  I read today that "Maturity says how can I fulfill my spouse’s desires. Immaturity says how can I get my spouse to fulfill my desires?"  With maturity comes selflessness.  THAT IS WORK FOLKS!  Sure we are mature adults but Mike and I have really grown up together.  It's always a work in progress but well worth the ride!  I love you Michael Paul and respect the fact you have not given up on this marriage when at time I thought we should have.  Look how far we have come and how much we have grown.  Think how much more is out there just waiting on us.  We have so much more to learn and I want nothing more than to continue this journey with you by my side.  I like where we are headed and man, do I appreciate the struggles that have made us stronger in our faith and in each other!!!  Without them we would not be experiencing what we have today.

 

* You can click on the pink colored words to take you directly to her website/blog *

Prayer Day 24 ~ Alone With God

January 24 ~ ALONE WITH GOD ~
Lord Jesus, when You were on earth, You knew Your were never alone because Your heavenly Father was always with You.  Help me to have that same ongoing sense of your presence too.  Help me to be so aware of Your presence throughout each day that I can feel Your love taking away on sense of loneliness and healing me to complete wholeness.  I know that when I walk with you, I can never truly be alone.
For I am not alone, but I am with the Father who sent Me.
John 8:16

God’s presence with us is one of His greatest presents to us.

Growth in grace requires much prayer, and solitude is often essential to prayer in its most effective form. Jesus recommended drawing aside into one's "closet" to pray, knowing that God will openly reward all who come to Him in heartfelt, secret prayer. It is difficult, I know, to find time in these busy days to be alone. It pays to be alone with God. Alone with God! What a blessed place! Sweet refuge, where the heart can unfold itself. Alone, alone with God!

Savin' the Lincolns

I saw a blog post this morning about a simple little savings plan.  This lady started in January of last year and saved over $350 dollars without really trying.  She said every time she had a $5 bill she would stash it in an envelope.  Can it be any simpler than that?  How many times do you go grab your kids food and pay with a $20 bill and get change back?  Almost every single time, right?  (Poor example since this month we are not doing fast food, due to fasting)  Why not take that $5 bill and save it???  You would more than likely spend it on something not needed in all reality.  I already thought wait....there is a flaw in this or it's not going to have the same outcome for me.  I use my debit card more often than not.  It comes right out of my bank account and it's rare for me to walk around with cash.  I guess we shall see.  I'm up for it and it sounds super simple.  I am going to consider it a little gift to my family at the end of the year.  If anything it could be spending money for a trip we take together or go towards a major appliance or improvement in our home.  Something the whole family can enjoy :) ~ knowing me if I save more than I plan it will go into a CD or high yield savings account.  Keep on saving folks!  I'd love to hear your suggestions or stories of savings plans.

I think I will go break a $20 today and ask for only $5 bills.  Since it's late in January I need to start somewhere...... 

It's none of my business if you have a savings account but I can say this without hesitation.  I enjoy and appreciate saving money now.  I feel a sense of accomplishment!!  As soon as we are paid we tithe and then deposit a set amount into savings.  I just feel strongly that if I want to help myself in the future I have to plan for it now.  I doubt there will be much available to us at retirement age.  Meaning programs (social security), etc.  It's up to us. 

Prayer Day 21, 22 & 23

January 21
Thank You, Lord, that You are near to me when I call upon You with my whole heart.  I call to You today because I need to feel Your love, peace, joy and power in my life.  Thank You, Lord, that Your Holy Spirit lives in me and is with me always, so I don't have to be alone.  Help me to sense Your presence now and make me more and more aware of Your healing love each day.
The Lord is near to all who call upon Him,  to all who call upon Him in truth.
Psalm 145:18

January 22
Lord, fill me afresh with Your Holy Spirit.  Flow through me with Your living water and cleanse my soul of all loneliness.  I refuse to be double-minded by thanking You for Your presence and then acting as if You are not there.  Take away any pain of feeling alone and help me to sense Your presence in a deeper way.  Thank You that You are always loving me to wholeness.
Draw near to God and He will draw near to you.
James 4:8

January 23
Lord Jesus, how ofter You withdrew from other people to be alone.  But You were never really alone because You were always with Your heavenly Father.  The one time You must have felt deeply alone was when You cried out to God saying, "Why have You forsaken Me?"  But Your were forsaken so that I will never have to be.  Thank You, Lord, for liberating me from loneliness forever.
When Jesus perceived that they were about to come and take Him by force to make Him king, He departed again to the mountain by Himself alone.
John 6:15

RANDOM THOUGHTS:
There are those times when we feel alone or separated from others. I can feel lonely because I am struggling with something personal that I don’t think anyone else can relate to. I can also feel lonely when I am in the midst of a crowd but overwhelmed with a personal life issue. I miss the connection with them assuming they don’t understand what I am going through. The reality is that they may not know anything about it.

The smiling faces we see in most pictures aren’t always telling us the truth. We can’t assume that people feel loved by the way we see them interacting with others. We all know how to look good in public or to talk good on the phone. But often times the loneliest people are the ones who look the least alone. Because we don’t believe they need anything from us we tend leave them alone.

Loneliness can be a result of feeling rejected by someone that is important to us. We may have had a friend move out of town, or someone in our life has gone through a significant life change that alters the way we have been used to connecting subsequently we feel alone.  We don’t have to assume someone is in trouble or is desperately alone in order to contact them. Maybe it will mean even more to someone that we called them “just because”. But there are those who really need to know they aren’t alone today. Your spontaneous “hello” may make a world of difference to them. 

So, what’s the point? Reach out to someone today. Ask the Lord to put someone on your mind to call or stop by to see.  My guess is you already have a person on your mind and need to stop putting it off....... 

Prayer Day 19 & 20

January 19
Lord, help me to be content with where I am, knowing that You will not leave me there forever.  Help me to never have jealousy or envy because of the love or companionship that someone else has or enjoys.  Help me to keep my eye on You and not on what others do or don't do for me.  Thank you that you will never leave me or forsake me.
Let your conduct be without covetousness; be content with such things as you have.  For He Himself has said, "I will never leave you nor forsake you."
Hebrews 13:5

January 20
Lord, you are the one who knows me best and cares for me the most.  You are the one who has committed unconditional love to me for eternity.  Help me not to fault other people for what I perceive as their not loving me or caring for me as I want them to.  Help me to continue to show love to others no matter what their response is to me.
For your Maker is your husband, the Lord of hosts is His name; and your Redeemer is the Holy One of Israel; He is called the God of the whole earth.
Isaiah 54:5



Please remember I'm NOT writing these daily prayers myself ,they are shared with you from the following book of daily reflections:
I am not trying to steal the work of others.  Only trying to share with as many people as I can.

Prayer Day 16, 17 & 18

My hopes are that each of you start your week off feeling blessed.  I came home last night from a special treat.  I was able to share the weekend at my family's lake cabin with a very dear friend of mine.  We talked, goofed, laughed, watched movies, scared each other, went to Tahlequah, OK to visit another friend, enjoyed some yummy food and ate LOTS of junk food.  We had such a relaxing weekend doing NOTHING.  It felt so good to get to catch up with her and be in our element.  Reminiscing on just how far we have come over the years.  Diana and I have been friend for several years now.  I must admit we are remarably blessed.  One, to have each other in our lives and to know we don't have to talk everyday to understand how important we are to each other.  Two, our friendship is not based on "what have you done for me lately" but purely out of respect and love.  Three, that GOD gave us each other for MANY REASONS!  Talk about two ladies that have been through so many seasons together.  I'm not talking about fall or summer folks.  I thank Him for giving me her.  Love you Diana! 

January 16
Lord, show me where I have anxious thoughts within me.  Search my heart and expose anything that keeps me from the wholeness You have for me.  I want to become all You made me to be, and I know that's not possible as long as anxiety rules my heart.  Thank You that You did not make me to live with anxiety or sadness, but You created me to find joy in You every day.
Search me, O God, and know my heart; try me, and know my anxieties.
Psalm 139:23

January 17
Thank You, Lord, that You are always with me.  Help me to remember that at all times, especially when I feel lonely.  Because You died for me, Jesus, I know that depth of Your love for me.  Because Your Spirit is within me, I always have the comfort of Your presence.  Enable me to sense Your presence and love in a great way than ever before so that I can be lifted out of any loneliness I feel.  Take the pain of loneliness away from me forever.
I am with you always, even to the end of the age.
Matthew 28:20

January 18
Thank You, Lord, that You will never reject me or cast me away from Your presence.  Thank You that You always remember me.  You knew me before I was born.  Before I ever knew of You, You thought of me.  Help me to think of You always too.  May my thoughts of Your love set me free from the pain of loneliness.  Help me to think of loneliness as a reminder that I need to draw closer to You.
God has not cast away His people whom He foreknew.
Romans 11:2


Please remember I'm NOT writing these daily prayers myself ,they are shared with you from the following book of daily reflections:I am not trying to steal the work of others. Only trying to share with as many people as I can.

Prayer Day 14 & 15

I think I am going about sharing the daily prayers all wrong.  I should be typing these in advance to share with you so you can read them on the day of or at least be given that opportunity.  Hopefully this works out better for those checking the blog daily.

January 14
Lord, I confess that there are things that make me feel anxious in my soul.  I lift them up to You and ask that You would take those anxieties away and give me Your peace.  Comfort my soul as only You can do.  Help me to understand my life and my circumstance from Your perspectives so that I won't be tempted to dwell on them with a heavy heart.  Thank You for the comfort of Your unfailing love.
In the multitude of my anxieties within me, Your comfort delights my soul.
Psalm 94:19

January 15
Lord, I confess to You that sometimes I feel down, but I know You have joy, gladness, peace and fulfillment for me right where I am.  Help me to put my hope in You and praise You in the midst of whatever I experience.  Help me to look to You for everything, for You are my God who puts a smile on my face and joy in my heart.
Why are you cast down, O my soul?  And why are you disquieted within me?  Hope in God; for I shall yet praise Him.
Psalm 42:11

Here is something else I read today on a post from facebook.  I LOVED IT SO MUCH and felt compelled to shared.  *** add them as a friend~  They share a lot of value, in my opinion.  ENJOY FOLKS :)  GO HAVE A BLESSED DAY & AN ENJOYABLE, FULL OF HAPPINESS AND MANY MEMORIES FULL OF LOVE THIS WEEKEND!

Daily Inspiration and Motivation ~ January 13, 2012

Everyone has gone through seasons when the challenges of life feel overwhelming. During those times, it’s easy to be tempted to talk about how bad things are. Maybe you received a bad medical report, or maybe you’re facing a financial obstacle. But the more you talk about something, the bigger it becomes in your mind. Instead, you’ve got to dig your heels in and say, “No, I am not going to give life

Remember, even if you don’t see how things could ever work out, God does. Speak to those mountains in your life and declare God’s favor over those situations. Instead of talking to God about how big your problems are, talk to your problems about how big your God is! As you speak to your mountains, they will be moved, and you will move forward into the victory God has prepared for you!

* E V E R Y O N E * should say this daily!  BELIEVE & ACHIEVE!!!!

 Please remember I am not writing these daily prayers myself.  I am simply sharing them with you.  They are taken from the following daily reflections book:

 

Prayer Day 11, 12 & 13

January 11
Lord, I thank You for Your mercy and that Your mercies are new every morning when I wake up.  Thank You that Your are faithful to love me unconditionally.  Help me to remember that because of Your mercy and love, I have all I need and I can refuse to feel anxiety about the present or future.  I just need to pray about them.
Through the Lord's mercies we are not consumed, because His compassions fail not.  They are new every morning: great is Your faithfulness.
Lamentations 3:22-23

January 12
Lord, receive my soul and help me to have a vision for the future.  Take anything out of my mind and my life that is not of You.  Enable me to be faithful to You and Your ways and to live a life based on the truth of Your word.  Help me to never lie to myself and to others and compromise the life You have for me.
My soul melts from heaviness; strengthen me according to Your word.  Remove from me the way of lying, and grant me Your law of graciously.
Psalm 119:28-29

January 13
Lord, I thank You that You hear my prayers, my praise and my thanksgiving to You.  Thank You that I can make the desires of my heart known to You and You will hear and answer.  I lift up to Your everything that concerns me today and ask that You would make it all work out for my greatest good.  I am grateful and because of You I don't have to be anxious about anything.
Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God.
Philippians 4:6

Prayer Day 8, 9 & 10

January 8
Lord, I put my hope in You.  I refuse to look to another thing or other people to give me purpose, fulfillment and peace.  I confess any anxiety I have as a lack of trust in Your ability to sustain me.  I submit my life to You and put all my expectations in Your goodness, power and love.  Help me to pray about everything and trust You in ever part of my life.
My soul waits silently for God alone, for my expectations is from Him.
Psalm 62:5

January 9
Lord, thank You that whenever my heart is heavy, I can call on You and You will hear me.  I know that if You hear my voice, You will answer my prayers.  Therefore, I will not allow the enemy of my soul to bring me down with thoughts that make me anxious, sad or depressed.  I will come to You instead.
Depart from me, all you workers of iniquity; for the Lord has heard the voice of my weeping.
Psalm 6:8

January 10
Lord, I know that sometimes I worry about things, and You have said I don't need to be anxious about anything but rather to pray about everything.  I life up to You my situation and the things that trouble me most.  Take away the burden of them from me and help me see them from Your perspective.  Thank You for Your word that says You will perfect the things that concern me.  I put all my trust and confidence in You.
The Lord will perfect that which concerns me.
Psalm 138:8

~ * ~ Holy smokes ~ * ~  Let me just start with that.  Today is only Tuesday and I must admit I have been put through the ringer emotionally.  I am dealing with a situation that brings me great stress and as much as I try to set it aside or think I've set it aside there is a new added pressure that has occurred almost daily.  I feel week and start reverting back to a me I am not proud of.  I have struggled and I have cried but my heart makes no excuse and knows I must give it to God to move forward.  As I type these prayers it's as if they were written just for me.  I know they spoke to me and helped me so hopefully they are doing the same for someone else out there.  

** PLEASE NOTE**  The prayers are not written by me.  They are from a daily reflection book that was given to me as a gift this past Christmas.  I just feel moved to share and help others if I can.  Don't want to take credit for something that is not mine.

21 Days Of Fasting

Harvest Church invited the congregation to join in on a great way to kick off 2012. 

We will begin fasting on Monday, January 9th and join together in believing for the SUPER NATURAL favor of God for 21 days and the remainder of 2012.  A book came highly recommended to read called "The Fasting Edge" by Jentzen Franklin.

 

I have never done this personally and am learning as I go.  I've always wanted to understand more about fasting so I am humbled and looking forward to this journey.  What I have come to understand so far is fasting and prayer are a way of helping you to sever addictions.  I liked in the book when it referred to fasting as " the spiritual DRANO that unclogs the flow of the living water in our soul."  It also said that fasting does not just pertain to what you put in your stomach, but what you feed your soul and spirit as well.  I found this LINK helpful.

So I am sitting here thinking, I don't have addictions like the book talks about.  I am not addicted to drugs, alcohol, tobacco...... On a funny note I may be addicted to Starbucks.  Does that count?  Maybe I can use my addiction to cakes or cookies?  I am not making light of this by any means.  I am just thinking.  I want this to be life changing and meaningful.  I want to grow stronger in my faith.  Stronger in my personal relationship with God.  I think it's a great opportunity to learn my strength on different levels.  Seeing how that is my focus this year (One Little Word, I posted about this a couple days ago).  My prayers and areas of focus will be restoring areas of my marriage ~ direction and guidence when dealing with family issues.  I am positive it will go deeper and beyond just those two areas.

If fasting should break the routine then I think my fast will include the following:

NO FAST FOOD!!!!  Meals will be prepared in our home daily.  Regardless of events that are taking place in our life right now (baseball practice starts this week and we have basketball Thursday & Saturdays) I also want to make it a point to sit at our table to eat dinner.  We too often are "on the run" and some of us eat in the living room, one might be at the table and sadly even in the bedroom (while boys are into a video game).  So, to answer my question earlier regarding Starbucks, I am omitting that from my usual daily routine.  NO McDonald's, NO All American Pizza, NO Braums, NO Chili's.  NO Canton's (oh my!)  YOU GET THE CONCEPT.  This is VERY different for us and our normal routines. 

NO COKE or SWEET TEA!!!!  COKE, now that was a serious addiction of mine a couple years ago.  Like I had to have some daily and several times daily.  Now I can go days without it but when I do have some Coke it's like my body requires it.  It's stupid, I know.  Sweet tea is something I know I am addicted to and drink EVERY DAY.  It is usually in a Route 44 Sonic cup (with extra extra ice) that I carry all day or Red Diamond plastic bottle like a water bottle.  It is my water!  As I type this it sounds so trivial and SAD. 



Prayer Day 6 & 7

January 6
Lord, in the night when I feel anxious about things and I'm tired and overwhelmed with all that I face, it's then that I long for Your presence more than ever.  My soul seeks Your Holy Spirit, my Comforter, to comfort me.  Help me to stay in Your presence both day and night so I can sense Your freedom from worry at all times.
With my soul I have desired You in the night, yes, by my spirit within me I will seek You early.
Isaiah 26:9

January 7
Lord, I confess that sometimes I get anxious about whether my needs will be met.  Whether I will always have a home to live in and food to eat.  Whether I will be able to provide for the family members You have given me to care for.  Lord, take away all anxiety and help me to have peace.  Help me to no longer worry about the future because I have released it into Your hands.
Do not seek what you should eat or what you should drink, nor have an anxious mind.
Luke 12:29

MY PERSONAL PRAYER:
Dear Lord,  I come to you asking please send peace to my family.  As you know we need your help getting through this season.  I pray you take each of us by the hand and guide us.  Our son struggles with more than most could understand.  He has been places we have not.  Seen things we have not.  He has encountered things that have changed him but I know his heart and I pray he starts feeling the urge to be that person he deep down longs to be.  I pray you help him in releasing his anger.  His life is about to change again and I pray you show him your desired path.  He requires your guidance, as we all do and I have faith in your direction.  I pray strength be given to my family as we face the future.  May we all learn and grow from this season we are in.  My heart thanks you for blessing us with the time we were given to spend together as family these past few weeks.   ~AMEN

One Little Word

Some of you know about ONE LITTLE WORD.  I came across it and found it intriguing a couple years back on an Ali Edwards blog.  Let me just say I fell head over heels for the idea and decided to adapt the concept in my life. She usually has a worksheet and a list of words for you to draw inspiration from.  I enjoy reading the meanings and examples other people have come up with.  It's 100% your word and needs to be something that moves you!  I like to have jewelry made that I wear as a constant reminder of MY one little word.  If you are a reader make a bookmark with your word.  Use one in your favorite book and your bible.  Put it on your bathroom mirror.  Just make it about YOU and what it takes to achieve YOUR word to the fullest! 

My word in 2010 was FORGIVENESS.
It was a time for me to let go of the past.  A past that had been holding me down for too long.  I knew  giving Forgiveness would allow me move on to bigger and better things that maybe I didn't think I was worthy of.  My goal was to lift a burden I had carried/struggled with for years.  I held grudges and that alone made me a weaker and bitter person.  You can't be bitter and be happy.  I turned to food for comfort in those moments of weakness and neglected things I should not have.  Learning to let go and start Forgiving myself led to the forgiveness of others.  It's a freeing feeling words alone are not able to express.  Not easily obtainable but worth the effort it requires.  I mean who doesn't want to feel this kind of peace??

My word for 2011 was BLESSED.
No doubt the perfect word for last year.  Regardless of obstacles and hurdles in my path I was able to learn to see just how blessed I was and am.  Confused?  What I am saying is it took a lot to finally understand I am blessed and I am worthy.  You learn from your situations as well as circumstance(s).  I may not have it all in the eyes of others.  It may not be the best of the best but I do know I am Blessed to have my freedom to worship my God.  Blessed to have a husband that is a provider to his family.  Blessed to have handsome & healthy boys.  Blessed to have found a church I call my home.  Blessed with the opportunities to see just how far I've come.  *just to name a few of my blessings*  Here is the piece of sterling silver I had made last year.

My word for 2012 is STRENGTH.
I do this instead of setting resolutions that can be limited.  Strength is physical, emotional and mental.  This word will run pretty deep with me.  Call it a gut feeling if you will.  I have been told several times over the last three or so years what a "strong" person I am.  Please know I am NOT talking myself up.  I am simply stating it's NOT what I've felt on the inside.  I can wear a smile, grin & bear it or fake it till I make it with the best of them.  I desire more than that and I deserve more.   I'm not just talking push-up and lots of treadmill time.  It's about about standing Strong in more than just my physical appearance or physical health but also Strength in my faith, marriage, family, and friendships.  I want to be Strong in resolve.  Strong in standing up for what is right and best for my family.  Strong in my decision making.  I will learn to draw my Strength in knowing who I am, what I am capable of and be secure in being that person!  I might push some limits, struggle with personal trials and even fail at times but I will not give up because real Strength will be MINE in 2012. 

Prayers Day 1-5

I was given a gift from a girlfriend this Christmas that I feel will be THE GIFT THAT KEEPS ON GIVING!!  It's a daily reflection book called Prayers for Emotional Wholeness by Stormie Omartian.  A small package FULL OF POWER!  I feel moved to share as I read them.  I fully plan to read daily but may not be able to blog daily.  I know life gets busy and often we neglect things that mean something to us.  As a way of following through I may not post these daily but rather a few days at a time.  Then give my opinion or let you know how it affects me in a current situation or maybe share how it can work in my life to better myself.  Hopefully I share something that can make a difference in your life as well.

January 1
God's purpose for our lives is to make us whole- which is the way He created us to be- and then to work through us for His glory as we surrender our lives to Him.  Emotional wholeness means living without negative emotions and having peace about who you are and where your life is headed.  When we pray to God, we are spending time in His presence.  And in His presence is where we find healing from the pain of our past.  Prayer draws us closer to God, where we can get a vision from our future and better understand our purpose.

January 2
Lord, I thank you for Your Word because it is good and it gives me life.  It puts joy in my heart every time I read it.  I pray that Your Word in me will fill my heart with Your love and peace and cause all anxiety, depression and other dark clouds to blow away from me like ashes in the wind.  I ask that you would take away any sadness in my heart and set me completely free from all negative emotions.
Anxiety in the heart of man causes depression, but a good word makes it glad.
Proverbs 12:25

January 3
Lord, help me to not feel anxious about my future or getting my needs met.  Help me to trust that You have brought me this far and that You will bring me the rest of the way.  Help me to not worry about things but to take my concern to You in prayer instead and leave them in Your hands.
I say to you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink; nor about your body, what you will put on.  Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing?
Matthew 6:25

January 4
Dear Lord, because I am Your child, I don't have to be weighed down with anxiety.  Because Your Spirit lives in me, I have the power to rise above the things that trouble me.  Because I love You and Your ways, my life can be renewed every day.  Today I pray that You will take away all anxiety, sadness and depression and renew my mind and emotions.
Unless Your law had been my delight, I would then have perished in my affliction.  I will never forget Your precepts, for by them You have given me life.
Psalm 119:92-93

January 5
Lord, I pray that Your would take away any sadness I feel and evaporate all depression or oppression that hangs heavily over me.  I want to experience Your joy in my soul at all times.  I want to feel the lightness of heart I know You have for me.  Thank You for bearing my sorrow so I don't have to carry it myself.  Help me to experience Your peace that passes all understanding.
Surely He has borne our griefs and carried our sorrows; yet we esteemed Him stricken, smitten by God and afflicted.
Isaiah 53:4

After typing this and rereading these prayers I think to myself, WOW!  When you can't seem to find the right words just pray.  Even if you can't speak and find yourself sitting in silence thinking of HIM, He knows where your HEART is....  He knows what your needs are.  He knows what you are thinking and what's hurting you.  GIVE IT TO GOD!  It's biblical folks and He is the only one that can guide you to where you are meant to be.  Once you let go and let Him you can feel a change begin in your life.  Read these prayers out loud if that helps you.  Write your favorite down and pray it daily if you wish.  Just because these are intended to be read on a specific day does not mean you don't have those particular feelings on different days or even some on a daily basis.  Something else I have done is put them in my phone as memos or type yourself a daily message (like a reminder or to-do) that pops up like an alarm on your phone or computer.  It helps you to set aside time for yourself, reflect and PRAY!!  This year I pray that I become more attentive to my spiritual needs.  What I mean by that is instead of getting to where I feel like I can't take much more I'll find reasons to be thankful and grateful in the current situation.  Carry no additional baggage or stress yet understand I am in this season for a reason.  Easier said than done but with Him on my side who can stand against me??

Wayne Leon DeMeritt "Pat"

Wayne Leon DeMeritt "Pat"

August 12, 1919 ~ December 25, 2011

My family and I suffered a great loss on Christmas morning.  It hurts so much feeling like such a huge piece of my heart is now missing.  The fact he is no longer in pain brings me peace.  I take with me many wonderful memories and for that I am grateful.  I love you Pat.  I will miss that smile, those beautiful blue eyes and most of all your touch.  You were a loving and compassionate Grandfather to me and even better Great Grandfather to my boys.  I can never thank you enough for that.

God saw you getting tired.

And a cure was not to be.

So, He put His arms around you

and whispered, "come to me".

With tearful eyes we watched you

and saw you fade away.

Although we loved you dearly,

we could not make you stay.

A golden heart stopped beating

and hard working hands laid to rest.

God broke ourh earts to prove to us

He only takes the best!